In work that I do with clients, the situations with the lowest return on time/energy (ROTE) consistently involve communications with those who don’t “get it.” “Getting it” and “not getting it” creates very strong in/out-group perceptions. “It” can take a number of different forms, and usually, I am on the outside looking in. I will hear, for example:

• THEY don’t get that a for-profit model can fit in health care.
• THEY don’t get that Canada is a different market from the U.S.
• THEY don’t get that they are losing the chance at more business down the road by being so contentious now.

My job is to help them to help the other side to “get it.” It can work, but not all the time. Recently, I fear, I was the one who was likely being accused of not “getting it,” which, honestly, is new for me. I actually pride myself on being able to see both sides of things, in most instances. As I understand, and tell my clients, when you are involved, things become less visible. On top of that, it can be completely unclear who is right.

For example, imagine those who did not want to give the automotive Big Three any U.S. Government funds.
For them, the situation is clear:

The Big Three (THEY) don’t get that the model is broken and more money is only prolonging their ultimate demise.

For those supporting a loan/bailout, it is equally clear:

The U.S. Gov (THEY) don’t get that we just need a bridge loan. Weather this storm, and we are set up for long-term success.

One of those positions is right, but only time will tell.

My recent challenge is bringing my “soft-skills” orientation into a “tech-savvy” environment in a discussion about creating value in information sharing and collaborating. Quite predictably, one of us is “not getting” that if and how people use any tool–not to mention the relationship between the parties–will dictate a large degree of effectiveness. Perhaps the other of us is “not getting” that in the future, personal relationships, perceptions and things like “the benefit of the doubt” have little or no role in the workplace.

One of those positions is right, but only time will tell.

Tags: Tags: Benefit of the Doubt, In-group/out-group, Technology in Communication —

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