Tom Blackwell raises a the dynamic of the “right to choose” in this piece on canada.com. The question is: who gets to decide what is best for a sick child: parents or doctors? I think we can all take comfort that the situations where this sort of dispute escalates to the Children’s Aid Society are “rare,” and needless to say, “emotional.”
Both doctors and parents, one can assume, have the best interest of the child at heart. But it may be more complicated than that: I recall hearing commentary on an instance in Vancouver–raised in the above article–whereby the parents of sextuplets refused blood transfusions because their Jehovah Witness faith did not allow the procedure. The commentary (I will try to find the source; you will have to trust me for now) was that in such instances, loving parents need to be legally forced, because it allows them to save the child, while also saving religious face.
If, in fact, both parties are focussed on what is truly best for the child, both are responsible and accountable. Parents need to be ready to make their case with more than just “this is what we want” or, worse “this is what our child wants.” With all due respect, it should not take a psychiatrist to determine that a child is unfit to determine the cancer-fighting procedures that they will receive. The medical profession must be granted some degree of trust and authority to make these decisions for people. This sort of latitude should be granted, but also needs to be earned.
Information is everywhere, and Google could probably help find a source to support that a diet of raw vegetables beats chemotherapy or that alternative care in Mexico will be more effective than Ontario hospital care. If these sources of information are being given the nod over what the doctor says, the doctor has some “selling” to do. Understanding the real concern takes time, and usually requires (1) creating a relationship of trust and (2) asking questions. Did the doctors do this? Did they have the time? the skill? Not everyone is going to take a doctor’s word as gospel; nor should they.
Medical research and past results are not the only forms of evidence, but will only be effective if the other party is listening. Fostering a dialogue can get people to open up to some grim realities. It must be a horrible decision to pick between a grueling medical procedure that might help, and a less extreme treatment that almost certainly won’t. That decision, however, should not be the parent’s, and definitely shouldn’t be the child’s!
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